Thirteen Ways to Have a Better Day
1. Think “happy” thoughts. (e.g.–“The guy who just cut in front of me and slowed down in 70mph traffic slowly lowered into boiling oil.”)
2. Smile at the world (and the world will wonder what the heck you’re up to).
3. Wear better-fitting shoes. (Or go barefoot. Sure, you’ll not be allowed in a McDonalds, but you are looking for a way to better your day, anyway, so that’s a win-win for ya.)
4. Avoid phones. (Don’t 90% of your hassles come from “miscommunications”?)
5. Uffda! Avoid “feeda“. *heh* (I once saw a graphic demonstration of the difference between the Norwegian expressions “uffda” and “feeda“–two guys walking; one pointed at the ground and said, “Uffda!” The other didn’t see “it” in time and said, “Feeda!” So, it’s uffda if you see “it” and feeda if you step in “it”… )
6. Be pleasant to idiots. (See the principle stated above. Uffda! You’ve been warned.)
7. Turn off the “news”. (Again, see numbers 5 and 6. *heh)
8. Eat some ice cream. (The joys of cold, sweetened fat!)
9. Take a nap. (There’s no problem that does not look better from behind closed eyelids.)
10. Laugh at life’s little “funnies”. (“So, two Muslim terrorists walk into a 230-grain bullet traveling at 830 feet per second… ” That’s both funny and economical! Don’tcha just love .45 ACP humor?)
11. Coffee!
12. Beer!
13. Pray “The Serenity Prayer”… Frequently.
Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill
BECAUSE THEY REALLY TICKED ME OFF!
Noted at the Thursday Thirteen Hub and trackposted to Perri Nelson’s Website, Rosemary’s Thoughts, The Random Yak, Woman Honor Thyself, The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns, Big Dog’s Weblog, The World According to Carl, The Pet Haven Blog, Pirate’s Cove, Blue Star Chronicles, The Amboy Times, Leaning Straight Up, The Yankee Sailor, and Gone Hollywood, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.
I’m all about #7 and #8 especially!
Happy TT!
http://blog.vigilant20.net/?p=1317
I’m a big supporter of bringing back nap time. I think we’d all be way less cranky. Great list!
David Dude! There you are! I must change my link to you…I tried the ‘.us’ addy a while back but it wouldn’t work. It’s so great to “see” you again, and thx for your visit this week! I’m going to practice all your 13’s this week…starting with the coffee. 🙂 Take care.
“Cold sweetened fat”….thanks so much; you’ve helped me immensely to resolve never to eat ice cream again.
Great list! “Be pleasant to Idiots” – aww must I? 😉
Happy T13!
I loved the idea, very funny! You should try a book list, it’s more chalenging than it looks! Especially if you’re going for over 200 words. Thanks for the comment! ~your friendly neighborhood MAV Writer~
David,
Just out of curiosity, did that person in #1 of the T-13 also have a fish symbol on the so-called “a** end” of the vehicle? [I’ve noted that quite often they do … AND … if one *honks* at them, then the response is one telling us that we are #1!]
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Re: “J. Lynne” comment, (#2 above) concerning nap time
Recently read (don’t have specific reference) one of the renegade MDs (perhaps Blaylock) that a nap is far worth more for heart health than any of the statin drugs currently being heavily promoted by the BigPharm poisioners!
Hugh,
The most recent example of #1 did not have a “fish” symbol on his tail; he had a DOT number on his trailer. Yup. 18-wheeler pulled in front of me suddenly when I was going the speed limit in the passing lane… and forced me to stand on my brakes while he got his rig up to… 55mph (and slowly thereafter to 60mph). (There was a “granny driver” in the slow lane and w/o checking behind him–or not caring–the trucker just decided to take a lane, any lane, no matter how unsafe his lane change might be. He ought to have been shot.)
I ended up having to pass the idiot in the “slow” lane, because he’d staked his claim to the passing lane.
Others behind me followed suit.