Thirteen Ways to Have a Better Day
1. Think “happy” thoughts. (e.g.–“The guy who just cut in front of me and slowed down in 70mph traffic slowly lowered into boiling oil.”)
2. Smile at the world (and the world will wonder what the heck you’re up to).
3. Wear better-fitting shoes. (Or go barefoot. Sure, you’ll not be allowed in a McDonalds, but you are looking for a way to better your day, anyway, so that’s a win-win for ya.)
4. Avoid phones. (Don’t 90% of your hassles come from “miscommunications”?)
5. Uffda! Avoid “feeda“. *heh* (I once saw a graphic demonstration of the difference between the Norwegian expressions “uffda” and “feeda“–two guys walking; one pointed at the ground and said, “Uffda!” The other didn’t see “it” in time and said, “Feeda!” So, it’s uffda if you see “it” and feeda if you step in “it”… )
6. Be pleasant to idiots. (See the principle stated above. Uffda! You’ve been warned.)
7. Turn off the “news”. (Again, see numbers 5 and 6. *heh)
8. Eat some ice cream. (The joys of cold, sweetened fat!)
9. Take a nap. (There’s no problem that does not look better from behind closed eyelids.)
10. Laugh at life’s little “funnies”. (“So, two Muslim terrorists walk into a 230-grain bullet traveling at 830 feet per second… ” That’s both funny and economical! Don’tcha just love .45 ACP humor?)
11. Coffee!
12. Beer!
13. Pray “The Serenity Prayer”… Frequently.
Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to hide the bodies of those I had to kill
BECAUSE THEY REALLY TICKED ME OFF!
Noted at the Thursday Thirteen Hub and trackposted to Perri Nelson’s Website, Rosemary’s Thoughts, The Random Yak, Woman Honor Thyself, The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns, Big Dog’s Weblog, The World According to Carl, The Pet Haven Blog, Pirate’s Cove, Blue Star Chronicles, The Amboy Times, Leaning Straight Up, The Yankee Sailor, and Gone Hollywood, thanks to Linkfest Haven Deluxe.