Day: March 12, 2019

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Amateur Flooring Project. . .

. . .is proceeding at a snail’s pace.

But, overall, that’s a Good Thing. For example, lifting two layers of vinyl flooring in the kitchen, at the garage door entrance, uncovered. . . rotting particle board. Particle board?!? Yep. And it seems to be original to the house, which is around 45 years old. Fortunately, as I began removing it, I discovered that the rot

a.) only extended about one foot into the kitchen from the garage
b.) did NOT include rot of the sill plate on the structural wall
c.) did not extend to the one inch (nominal; really ~3/4-inch) wooden boards that were the subfloor.

Well, as everyone knows, particle board is crap, and unsuitable for virtually ALL construction, but I wasn’t about to begin tearing up all the entire kitchen floor, once I got back to still solid particle board.

So, what to do? It looked like all the rot had been confined to directly un front of the door entering the kitchen from the garage, so, in fitting with my original thoughts for that entry, I

1. Cleaned a 2’x4′ area in front of that door, all the way down to the solid, unaffected (real) wood subfloor;
2. Caulked all cracks with “40-year” paintable caulk;
3. Painted the subfloor with Drylock™ where it had once been covered with tar paper (likely what prevented the rot from proceeding to the subfloor);
4. Put down “hardy board” backer board;
5. Laid and grouted ceramic tile, bringing the level back up to juuuuust barely over the level of the current floor+2 layers of vinyl.

That will, I think, adequately protect the subfloor from any insult, and provide very little transition downward for the laminate I am finishing up installing in the kitchen. BTW, the laminate is very water and moisture-resistant, but I am gluing the joints with a waterproof glue designed for laminate flooring, as an added precaution. A 2’x7′ area in front of the kitchen sink and dishwasher will not be getting laminate flooring but a fairly thick adhesive vinyl tile that is designed to be grouted. (I’ve already used the same vinyl tile for the front entry, and it has performed like a champ there, with heavy traffic for several months.) Same treatment in front of the French door exit/entry from dining area to deck.

After this flooring is down, since the bedrooms on this floor will only need carpet and staples removed, and some cleanup, minor restoration, I’ll then be able to start on replacing all the trim. Oh, yeh, I think I mentioned a month or two ago that the bedrooms have some nice oak flooring under the carpet. *smh* Means we have more laminate that we need for this floor. Hmmm, the laundry/pantry is begging for a reno (could be a half bath/cleaning supplies pantry), and the garage needs to be emptied for a conversion to laundry room/pantry/workshop. Laminate flooring used those places?

*huh* Will STILL be some left over. Probably enough to do the deck, once it is fully enclosed, eh? 🙂

Oh, and methinks my Wonder Woman wants new cabinets in the kitchen, too. And the master bath needs an update, and. . . 🙂

I’ll never have time to die. Especially since my amateur “handyman” approach is slow, largely from excessive creativity (or so I tell myself *heh*).

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“Alright” Is NOT All Right

I know I have already said things like this before, but whether you are all ready to read it again or not, here is is again. All together now, repeat after me: “Alright is altogether all wrong.”

OK, I will make an exception. If a writer seriously wants to indicate that he is faux literate and does not want me to purchase his book or lend him my “eye time,” then he should go ahead and use “alright.”

That is all.

No, it’s not. Completely unrelated sidebar: Brit writers who set a story in the US? Stop referring to the second floor of a building as the first floor. Do that for stories set in “BrE-land.” Give “boot” the boot unless you are referring to footwear or kicking something. And for the sake of all things linguistic, learn how to express the subjunctive mood!

NOW that is all. For now.

*grumble-grumble-gripe-complain*

BTW, it’s not just me.

https://www.writersdigest.com/online-editor/alright-vs-all-right

And there are more such worthy commentaries. Many, many more. And a few quislings who are perfectly happy to sully the English language with such despicable monstrosities as “alright.” And yeh, James Joyce apparently used “alright.” Once. That only condemns his “suckitudinous” writing even more. (That he used “all right” the rest of the time does not excuse the shitty nature of his books.)

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One Way to Ruin a Novel

Ran across a book recently where the writer chose the EASIEST way to ruin a “mystery/thriller” featuring loads of pseudo-forensics. Let me give you the three words that killed any suspension of disbelief:

Serrated hunting knife.

No, really. A murder weapon was determined to be a knife with a blade about six inches long with a serrated edge, THEREFORE it was a “hunting knife.” The serrated edge was the dead giveaway that the six inch blade HAD to be a “hunting knife.”

Quick, do an image search for “hunting knife.” Out of the first 50,000 images or so, how many had serrated blades? If you said more than five, then you found those few “hunting knives” made for people who have no idea how one is used and just think a serrated blade looks cool or “scary” or whatever.

Serrated hunting knife: #gagamaggot

Oh, there were other things that were evidence the writer didn’t have a clue about whatever subject was mentioned–“handwavium” determined how one character became wealthy, LOTS of wildly inappropriate “smirks” (*gag-spew*), off-scene “ghost characters” with no character or reason for existence, etc., but “serrated hunting knife” presented as being a hunting knife because it is serrated (“Ooo! I have a BREAD KNIFE that qualifies as a ‘hunting knife’ under this writer’s criteria!”) just takes the cake.

“Have you confirmed what kind of knife was used to cut her throat?”

“Yes. Six-inch serrated blade.”

“A hunting knife.”

Thereafter, “serrated hunting knife” is repeated ad nauseum.

Oh, BTW, I like knives a lot. I have several “hunting knives.” None of them are serrated. I have never actually seen (apart from the three pictures out of the first five or six pages I viewed in a casual search) a “serrated hunting knife,” and definitely not ITRW. I know they exist, because some folks are just stupid that way, but even those that do won’t have a six-inch edge that is serrated, only a small bit near the handle.