[Stolen from someone on FB… who stole it from someone else… ]
Expiration Dates *heh*
Yeh, I really ought to check ’em. Bought some cream, but before I could use it, it’d soured.
Oh, well. Made butter. Yum. Better than lemonade from lemons.
Great Scene
Just saw the end of an episode of a show that I sometimes watch with my Wonder Woman. It tends to give me a rash *heh* but it’s not as bad as some. The greatness of this scene was the fruity lawyer going around a room telling folks that if a case ever came to trial, no matter what, “I win.” *heh*
I kept expecting him to say, “Even if I have to hit [the other lawyer] with my purse, I win.”
Great scene, even if the best part was in my imagination. *heh*
Sometimes, I Just Have to Say, “No”
A while back, I decided to give a Windows “news and tips” site a whirl and submitted a secondary email address in order to receive notices of site updates. Since then, it’s yielded a few interesting tidbits, but sometimes, “a few interesting tidbits” just doesn’t cut it.
Recently, a portion of a topic line stood out, as at least 2/3 of the topic lines received in updates from the site have. Again, not in a positive light. The portion–this time–that made me wince: “The reason behind its name revealed !”
WTF is with the (usual and customary, from this source) space between the last word and the punctuation? It’s stupid. And, as I said, usual from this source. But that’s just the normal quality of punctuation usage from this source. What about word usage and grammar?
In the same email update: “Not why it a browser.”
?!? Yes, that’s the entire sentence fragment posing as a sentence. Where’s the verb?
And then, “…to make it running as fast and stable as new.” No, dumbasses, “to make it RUN as fast and stable as new” would at least be marginally acceptable, although “fast and stable” in this context is problematic.
“Since the last couple of days I’m seeing… ” Obviously English is a second language for the writer. Either that or the writer is a recent American college graduate.
I’ve only scratched the surface of the ear-grinding English constructions in just this one email. I can’t take it anymore. Unsubscribing, with prejudice. *heh*
Really, I Do Spend Most of My Time Doing Other Things. Really.
Founders Roll Over in Their Graves
Counting One’s Blessings
A lesson in counting one’s blessings from someone not quite as bad off as Job. From a fictional account of soldiers in field training by LTC (ret) Tom Kratman:
“How’s it going, sir?”
“My ticks are well fed and fattening up nicely, thank you. The chiggers are dug in to standard, with overhead cover. My ringworm garden overfloweth. My athlete’s foot is coming along, though I think I need to wrap my feet in plastic bags for a while to get a really world class case. And then there’s some kind of rot on my crotch that I can’t quite identify but which definitely shows promise, character development-wise… ”
*heh* Not exactly Job territory, but more than any of these asshats had to complain about.
So, count your blessings, folks. And remember, every silver lining has a cloud. 🙂
“To Blave”
Found on FB:
Just Askin’
Saw this on the “home” page* for my lil toy 15.6″ Asus, an OK lil thing with notalotta horsepower but just enough for common tasks, and wondered…
“The ASUS P50IJ notebook is the best business computing companion you could ever own…”
Really? What about that sexy slave girl with the abacus over there? Hmmm?
“Worst thing a woman can say to a man?”
I wouldn’t know, since I have to leave home to be abused by women (my Wonder Woman is far, far too nice to me), but I would imagine this might make the top ten:
“Good morning, sunshine! If you think you need your ‘package’ don’t worry. It’s in a jar of formaldehyde on my dresser… “
*ouch*
So, what do you think the worst might be?