The Last Laugh

Psalm 2
1 Why do the nations rage,
And the people plot a vain thing?
2 The kings of the earth set themselves,
And the rulers take counsel together,
Against the Lord and against His Anointed, saying,
3 “Let us break Their bonds in pieces
And cast away Their cords from us.”

4 He who sits in the heavens shall laugh;
The Lord shall hold them in derision.
5 Then He shall speak to them in His wrath,
And distress them in His deep displeasure:
6 “Yet I have set My King
On My holy hill of Zion.”

7 “I will declare the decree:
The Lord has said to Me,
‘You are My Son,
Today I have begotten You.
8 Ask of Me, and I will give You
The nations for Your inheritance,
And the ends of the earth for Your possession.
9 You shall [h]break them with a rod of iron;
You shall dash them to pieces like a potter’s vessel.’ ”

10 Now therefore, be wise, O kings;
Be instructed, you judges of the earth.
11 Serve the Lord with fear,
And rejoice with trembling.
12 Kiss the Son, lest He be angry,
And you perish in the way,
When His wrath is kindled but a little.
Blessed are all those who put their trust in Him.

Hollyweird’s Penchant for Degrading Classics Continues Apace

Yeh, SJW propaganda in “Mary Poppins Returns,” courtesy of Disney, Marc Shaiman, and Scott Wittman (three elements that disrecommend almost any movie nowadays), seems to be the case. OK, so maybe it won’t as readily gag a maggot as their treatment of “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.” At least Shaiman and Whitman, from available trailers and synopses, cast, etc., seem to have been more subtle in their destructive efforts in the new M.P. movie.

Still, thanks but no thanks. I’ll stick with the 1964 version that mellowed P.L. Travers’s original, rather freakily scary, Mary Poppins (in her books). I may make myself watch the whole thing at some point, in an effort to bend over backwards in fairness, but currently available information doesn’t militate for any urgency to do so.

Meanwhile, sing along (in the space between your ears, as it were–there’s PLENTY of space between mine to accommodate the piece. . . *heh*):

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Mary Poppins:
When trying to express oneself, it’s frankly quite absurd,
To leaf through lengthy lexicons to find the perfect word.
A little spontaniaty keeps conversation keen,
You need to find a way to say, precisely what you mean…

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Even though the sound of it is something quite atrocious!
If you say it loud enough, you’ll always sound precocious,

Ensemble:
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye

Mary Poppins:
When Stone Age men were chatting, merely grunting would suffice.

Bert:
Now if they heard this word, they might have used it once or twice!

Mrs. Corry:
I’m sure Egyptian pharoahs would have grasped it in a jiff,
Then every single pyramid would bear this hieroglyph;

Oh!
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Say it and wild animals would not seem so ferocious!

Mary Poppins:
Add some further flourishes, it’s so ro-co-co-coscious!

Ensemble:
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye

Bert:
The Druids could have carved it on their mighty monoliths!

Mrs. Corry:
I’m certain the ancient Greeks would have used it in their midst!

Mary Poppins:
I’m sure the Roman Empire only entered the abyss,
Because those Latin scholars never had a word like this!

Ensemble:
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Mary Poppins:
If you say it softly the effect can be hypnoscious!

Bert:
Check your breath before you speak, in case it’s halitotious!

Ensemble:
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye
Um-diddle-diddle-um-diddleye

Mary Poppins (spoken):
Of course you can say it backwards, which is Suoicodilaipxecitsiligarfilacrepus!

Michael (spoken):
She may be tricky, but she’s bloody good!

Mary Poppins:
So when the cat has got your tongue, there’s no need for dismay!
Just summon up this word and then you’ve got a lot to say!

Bert:
Pick out those eighteen consonants and sixteen vowels as well,
And put them in an order which is very hard to spell…

Mary Poppins:
S-u-p-e-r
C-a-l-i-f-
R-a-g-i-l-

Jane and Michael:
I-s-t-i-c-e-x-p-i-a-l-i-d-o-c-i-o-u-s!

Ensemble:
S-u-p-e-r
C-a-l-i-f-
R-a-g-i-l-
I-s-t-i-c-e-x-p-i-a-l-i-d-o-c-i-o-u-s!

S-u-p-e-r
C-a-l-i-f-
R-a-g-i-l-
I-s-t-i-c-e-x-p-i-a-l-i-d-o-c-i-o-u-s!

S-u-p-e-r
C-a-l-i-f-
R-a-g-i-l-
I-s-t-i-c-e-x-p-i-a-l-i-d-o-c-i-o-u-s!

Bert (spoken):
Here we go!

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Even though the sound of it is something quite atroscious!
If you say it loud enough, you’ll always sound precocious,
Supercalifragilistic-

Jane and Michael:
Supercalifragilistic-

Ensemble:
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!
Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious!

Make This New Year’s Resolution. New Worlds Await You.

I don’t care what your beliefs are (well, I do, but it’s not a necessary component of this comment), read The Bible this year. You will not find a better collection of great literature with more influence on the formation of Western Civilization. Even absent assent to its premise and assertions about the nature of the universe, mankind, and our reason for being, Santayana’s Axiom applies: reading it even as just an historical document is important. One cannot even grasp whence we came (and hence, where we are) without reading it, so if for no other reason, read it for that. (But wait! There’s more. . . 🙂 )

N.B. I use “reading” here to mean more than just “decode those funny lil squiggles into words.” Sadly, that is what many nowadays seem to view as the sum total of literacy. No, really reading something means to comprehend the meanings of the words, wrestle with them, engage in the Great Dialog with whomever wrote the text. This applies to reading anything, yes, even want ads. (Note also that I have borrowed “the Great Dialog” from Mortimer Adler’s introduction to “The Great Books of the Western World,” a collection that does not include The Bible only because, as he said, it was expected that everyone would have one of their own. The study guide–the “Syntopicon”–included with the set does)

Oh, and as a sidebar, and to actually aid in comprehension and the Great Dialog, when reading The Bible, I suggest using the King James Version precisely because of ots archaic language. It will make it more work (for some) to have to actually work through the archaic elements, and working at understanding is the first step to better reading comprehension of the text. Go ahead and give it a try. After a while, as actual accomplishment ensues, the work in and of itself will become enjoyable. Yes, it will take discipline and persistence, but practicing those virtues will also be rewarding.

Ambivalence. . .

Lovely Daughter gave us a lovely plaque to hang on our front door that reads, “Velkommen,” a nice Norwegian “Welcome.”

I want to hang this below it:

My Wonder Woman says, “No.”

*sigh*

If You Enjoy Writing Scathing Reviews of Crap

Just look for “gimmes” from wannabe writers on Amazon.1

Yeh, I’m just a wee tad irked with the “self-pub” wannabe writers who

a. Don’t bother to learn English (though it’s their native tongue)
b. Think characterization is accomplished by listing all the name-brand products a character uses, and describing the character by just saying what dim-witted celebrity the character resembles
c. Doesn’t bother to read their own text, and so commits multiple errors of continuity at the speed of light
d. And then packs all this wonderfulness into 100 pages (or, sometimes even worse, 200) of a “novelette lite” and calls it a “novel.” *sigh* “Novelette Lite” even with padding the word count with useless crap like, “. . .in which case he would probably be stuck out here for the rest of his life, however brief a period that turned out to be.” No. DELE “a period.” Wasted electrons. (*sigh* Rather like this whole post, eh? *heh*)

Fortunately, I only actually read through about one of these a week, because I reject the absolute worst of them within the first page of text. The “survivors” often get eviscerated in reviews, though I only note ten or so (and when I’m feeling generous, sometimes fewer) of the worst examples of text that would gag a maggot.

Yes, it got worse in the book I picked to pick on here. Because of certain external factors (namely a recommendation from someone whose recommendations are often on target), I stuck it out with the book the above example came from–through even more garbage–until,

“. . .the slug had been fired from a large-caliber handgun, probably a .45. . . He knew that such projectiles traveled at a high velocity, faster than the speed of sound. . . ”

Urm, no. A good rule of thumb for speed of sound, at sea level, under ideal conditions, is ~1,125fps. Not even a .45ACP+P with a light bullet weight of only 185gr travels that fast (max out at ~1,000fps muzzle velocity), and given the circumstances in the scene, I _seriously_ doubt the writer was referring to (or is even aware of) the .45 Colt (often called “Long Colt”) cartridge or the firearms it is used in, and even then, if he were, he’d have to have been talking about a +P load.

Sorry. When a writer just keeps spreading The Stupid, the book should be relegated to the scrub pile.


1Do note that I keep on “buying” freebie Indie pub books because I have thereby found a few really excellent writers whose other work I end up buying and reading, and not just writers of fiction. I’ve not yet found any good poets that way, but hope springs eternal.

Just Saw a Quintessentially Stupid Question. . .

. . .on Quora. (Of course. The site is almost as bad as FarceBook.)

“If removing the 300 million guns circulating in America is the only way to turn it into an Australian sanctuary, how would we do it?”

The first person to address the question did a pretty good job dealing with it, but I’d add a sidebar:

About that Utopian “Australian sanctuary. . . “ Since the Australian “gun ban” (although it’s not really a ban) in 1996, Australia has had well more than 10x the number of deaths per capita from single-actor massacres than the US—only a few of which were committed using firearms.

Yeh, Australia is not a violence-free paradise, and reducing the numbers of firearms in the hands of law-abiding folks has not reduced the per capita ratio of deaths from mass murders.


For anyone questioning my statement, just compare single-actor mass murder totals in US and in Australia since 1996 and run the numbers against the population of each country. If you have trouble with the math, go back to school and pay attention in class this time.

Anyone who has trouble doing a search for the basic data should go live in an “assisted computing facility.” (“Here, dearie, let me make that mouse click for you.”)

All Purpose “Apology”

To anyone I may have offended: if “Love means you never have to say you’re sorry,” then, sorry.

(I hope someone explains this to “slow readers.” *heh*)

A Teensy-Tiny Piece of History

Back in 1959, in observance of Alaska’s new statehood (1958), the Southern Baptist Convention sponsored an evangelistic effort, partnering with existing SBC churches in Alaska. My dad obtained sponsorship from the baptist church in Seward, Alaska, along with its partnering churches in the lower 48, and spent a month as part of evangelistic meetings, clinics on church music and church education, and in personal evangelism.

I have copies of letters between him and the sponsoring church, copies of various agendas for meetings, and a very special “cookbook” compiled by students of Shishmaref Day School, Shishmaref, Alaska.It’s a little ~4”x5” typewritten booklet with a hand lettered cover that includes such “recipes” (descriptions of preparation, no amounts given; kinda like my “Not a recipe” recipes I post here now and then *heh* like

Eskimo Ice Cream

  • grate reindeer tallow into small pieces
  • Add seal oil slowly while beating with hand
  • After some seal oil has been used, then add a little water while whipping
  • Continue adding seal oil and water until white and fluffy
  • Some berries can be added to it

It might be difficult to come by reindeer tallow and seal oil, here in America’s Third World County™, but it’d certainly be “keto friendly.” 🙂

Subliteracy: Mass-Man’s Pernicious Influence

Writers trying (and failing) to fake literacy and their tendency to misuse words they _think_ they know the meanings of simply manage to spread subliteracy. Today’s misused word (out of MANY by noon, despite the fact that I have not been on the Interwebs longer than 20 minutes today before now): utilize. No, it does not simply mean “use” in more (unnecessary) syllables. It either means a chemical process wherein the uptake of a nutrient is effected or to effectively use a thing for a purpose for which it was not originally intended (Thus “utilize” is often proper referring to redneck reengineering of common items for new, and often unique, applications. 🙂 ) At least, those were _once_ the very useful distinctions between “use” and “utilize,” but as subliterates spread their “mass-man” (TY, Ortega) influence to other subliterates, a once very useful word is becoming simply a pedestrian means of distinguishing between literates and subliterates.

Oh, and an annoyance to anyone who wants to genuinely master English.