Ya Just Can’t Make This Shiite Up

“Journalism”–offering employment opportunities to the subliterate.

In addition to the obvious reason, this Foxnews article chaps my buns because the author (and editor?) got paid for spouting this kind of gibberish:

“A Staples spokesperson confirmed to Fox News that they do not allow businesses that deal in firearms from entering the contest.”

Will someone please buy a copy of “English for Dummies” for the author of that monstrosity? (In case the site changes it w/o a transparent acknowledgement of the error(s), I’ll just post a screencap, hmm? CLICK to embiggen)

illiterate-journalist-03

Would someone like to diagram that sentence for me?