Category: I do these sorts of things so you don’t have to

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Do Your Homework

Consider reading the manual on a piece of equipment before blithely screwing things up in a confident burst of incompetence.

I once tossed a copy of a Haynes manual on a particular car to a mechanic who had screwed up work on that make/model and told him to do his homework before he touched another one. He did NOT like it. Don’t care. I didn’t like him. Heck, the Haynes manual was not nearly enough to cover all the intricacies of that car, but had he referred to even a Haynes, he would have had a really hard time screwing up as badly as he had. At the time, the manual was only $10, so I felt the snub was well worth it.

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Yeh, Well, I Definitely Do These Sorts of Things So You Don’t Have To

Was at my fav “fell off the back of a truck store,” today, and passed through the “$1 salvage items” aisle. Saw a $1 box of 12 bottles of BSP (buffered sodium phosphate) solution–bottled and prepped for use as enemas–and thought to myself, “Self, since thou doest always gargle salt water (sodium chloride + h2o) and this BSP is sodium phosphate+sodium chloride+water, and ingestion of “gargle water” ain’t on the menu, why not? Yeh, if and or when I get a sore throat this winter, I’m-a giving my mouth an enema. (Small amounts of sodium phosphates via mouth–traces not spit out with “gargle water”–are not harmful, and. . . prepackaged!)

Continue reading “Yeh, Well, I Definitely Do These Sorts of Things So You Don’t Have To”

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Quick Fix for “Cold Coffee Syndrome” ;-)

Sometimes, when I have yet to reach Optimal Coffee Levels, I set my mug down and. . . forget to sip The Holy Brew while it is at the proper temp. I used to keep an electric cup warmer on my desk for those times when my mind wandered, but my last use of such a thing was ~20 years ago, so. . .

REALY effective “silver bullet” thermos that holds a coupla mugs full of coffee. Pour some into a teensy lil eleven ounce cup and sip. Even if my mind wanders to something task-oriented and I let it cool, it’s usually only a coupla ounces that are cool and easily warmed up to nearly optimal temp with a refreshing from the thermos.

I know, I know: it’d be better to just practice better coffee/memory discipline. *shrugs* Lazy, I guess.

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Off the Left Field Wall

I hate allergies. A sneeze-cough while eating some delicious red beans and rice seasoned with freshly chopped habanero pepper. You got it. Habanero pepper bits caught in sinuses. *sigh* Grateful fir ready-mixed, lightly-pressurized nasal wash. *heh*

(BTW, the pressurized air-fryer/instapot did a great job with all elements of the red “beans and rice”–from caramelizing onions, to sauteeing the “polish” sausage, to bringing it all together on a “stew” setting–rice previously cooked, and I used canned red beans).

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Sometimes, it’s the little things, ya know?

*smh* at an otherwise quite competent writer who committed two wrongs in a recent work: consistently misusing “surly” when meaning “surEly” and failing to hire a competent proofreader (or editor). Apart from that consistent error, this particular piece is actually pretty good. Still. . . it’s little things like this that irk–sometimes more than major gaffs.

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“Dr Muerte’s Panacea for Pain”

Picked up some kind of contact rash in the last day or so. Despite observing pretty good hygiene with handwashing, etc. (including having worn nitrile gloves), I seem to have spread it to. . . rather uncomfy areas. So, tried an astringent product from FAK to alleviate itching. It works, but kinda like after stubbing one’s toe and asking “Dr. Muerte” for pain relief, getting a punch in the nose. I don’t really notice the itching now that everything is BURNING.

*heh*

“Pain is just weakness leaving the body” (and other convenient lies. 😉 ).

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More “News” in category: “Inventions for the Lazy, Stupid, and Incompetent”

Special lil pot holders to fit over the handles of pans, because using an ordinary pot holder is tooooo haaarrrd!

As a special invention for stupid, incompetent, and lazy people, it’s right on up there with special lil tools for cracking eggs and special-deshul tools to prevent “onion tears.”

These kinds of things are for people who were voted off the short bus for being too stupid.