Category: Blame it on the voices in my head–I do

Try as I might, I canNOT train MSOffice’s spellcheck in the differences between “affect” and “effect”. Dumbass subliterate M$ programmers seem to refuse to allow “effect” to be used as a verb. Of course, most people can’t discern between the two words, but one might think that fixing a spellchecker’s mistakes would be allowable for a user to effect.

(Yet another reason why I generally prefer OpenOffice/LibreOffice, although I have come to prefer and migrate back to Outlook 2010 from the “open[er/ish]” Thunderbird mail client.)

If it weren’t for people interfering with evolution, tomorrow could be a Much Better Day with many, many thousands of people who ought to be living in “Assisted Computing Facilities” (“Here, dearie, let me make that mouse click FOR you… “) having locked themselves out of Internet access via their own stupidity. But no, the dumbasses HAD to warn ’em… *grumble, grumble, gripe, complain*

Internet blackout looms for thousands: What you need to know

Dumbasses! Just think of the bandwidth NOT freed up because of warnings like this!

In a blogpost critiquing the easily mocked Eric Alterman’s assertion that conservatives are largely unsuccessful in penetrating the domains of academia and journalism because they “lack professionalism” the author sums up with this statement:

Just a reminder, when you tax socialists : you’ll get less of them.

In one short sentence two glaring punctuation errors, one orthography error and one misused word leap off the page to assault my eyes. The comma should be a colon; the space after “socialists” is a glaring orthography error; the colon should be a comma and “less” should be “fewer”.

But then, “professional” journalists, who supposedly have editors checking their work, often write prose as bad as that, so it doesn’t affect the post’s argument as badly as it otherwise might.

“Man, am I glad I found this! I’m going to put it in a safe place, now… ”

Lost again! (Now, THAT’S a “safe place”!)

If the Thugs Standing Around are going to engage in genital groping, they should at least offer the option of cross-sex genital groping (A.K.A. “hand jobs”) and lap dances to those who would prefer it.

I think it’d go well with a “Go Away” doormat and a used silhouette target (laminated), don’t you? And on the front door, “If you don’t have a search warrant, don’t knock. Just go away.”

*heh*

Not a hermit yet, but exploring the idea…

If W. H. Auden’s pithy observation holds water, I just might live forever:

As poets have mournfully sung,
Death takes the innocent young,
The rolling in money,
The screamingly funny
And those who are very well hung.

Well, at least there may be an up side to being me…

I used to be an excellent conductor. Still have the chops. So… I avoid lightning.