Unreasonable Standards

Disclaimer: I am no genius, and nor am I someone with an encyclopedic knowledge of darned near everything, but. . . I am an Odd, and my education is even Odd-er.

That may not explain to my readers why, when I read something written by a typical 20-something or older “grup” writer, I often just shake my head and compare their vocabulary, spelling, grammar, and knowledge base to an eleven or twelve-year-old. . . me.

Yeh, when I read a writer who has groped blindly for a suitable word and instead grasped an execrably UNsuitable word to use, I compare that writer’s vocabulary to my sixth grade self, partly because, while recovering from a second surgery, I discovered a set of vocabulary quizzes in a two-volume dictionary set (each volume at least four inches thick in large, oversized formats). Yes, I went through the college-level vocabulary test, NOT because I was “smarter” than the average sixth grader, just because I had read more, even before becoming temporarily restricted physically, but VORACIOUSLY more so during that restricted period.

And that, combined with my fundamentally Odd way of looking at reality, probably defined as much of the next sixty years of my life, as much as simply being an Odd has in general. And so, people with a Stupid Level Vocabulary™ (and often even stupider level grasp of syntax, orthography, and basic arithmetic, physical mechanics, and life in general) probably tend to irk me more than is useful.

Fortunate Son

I was blessed (though some seem to think “cursed”) to be raised in a family of literates, and not just “functionally literate,” but liberally-seeded with formally literate adults, and eventually (sometimes) not-too-shabbily-literate sibs. Combine that with the fact that I am an Odd1 and my life has continually been filled with bafflement when confronted with folks who, quite apart from literacy, aren’t even fluent in English, when it’s their native tongue!

So, yeh2, I spend way more time than is probably healthy listening around some folks’ grammar. But. . . about that word. *sigh* I do really tire of folks misusing it to the point that it has now lost a usefully distinctive meaning. Nowadays, it seems to be used primarily either in a pejorative sense in the phrase “grammar Nazi” to mean someone who is picky and offensive about language and who often corrects others’ misusages. And in that vein, “grammar” is generally misused to be a reference to any correctly spoken or orthographical speech or writing.

Nope. Grammar is “A set of rules and examples dealing with the syntax and word structures of a language. . . “3 Oh, it is more than that, and in common usage nowadays it is. . . much, much less. *sigh*

So, I am bothered not by the pesky gnats of syntax alone, but illiterate word misuses, bafflingly stupid punctuation (in writing, of course, although the way some speak weirdly placed commas can also be heard *heh*), and nonsensical neologisms**. Add to that the creation of subcultures with “lects” that are both independent of regional dialects and that seem to be structured specifically to utter nonsense (LitRPG/gamers for example, though not the only example; there is the “Friends” dialect as another example) and call it English, the popularized illiteracy/subliteracy/pseudo-literacy prevalent in the Mass Media Podpeople Hivemind, bureaucratese, lying liars who illiterately lie (A.K.A. politicians), and English seems to be in dire straits.

Oh, well. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. *heh*

(Oh, and just a wee lil “BTW,” here: “I’m trying really hard not to correct your grammar,” really should read “I’m trying really hard to not correct your grammar,” even though I really don’t try at all. . . )

Better:


2 Yeh, I find “yeh” to be a better representation of the expression than “yeah.” So sue me. It sounds to my ear more like what folks actually say.

Thanks for the Memories, John.

I’ve enjoyed the Heinlein-esque space opera by John Hindmarsh via Kindle Unlimited, so in memory of John and the pleasure he has afforded me (as well as in very minor support of his wife, Cathy), I’ve begun buying those space operas instead of just giving a wee tip via Kindle Unlimited. It’s a small thing but within my reach.

The next one (started by John and finished by Craig Martelle, with permission) drops on September 20th: You Don’t Know Jack. It’s a little Heinlein mixed with C. S. Forester series. A nice antidote/anodyne to the poisonous pain of Suckitudinous Fiction.

Faux-Literacy Example #8,759,356

“Paper mâché” #gagamaggot. Seriously, if one uses a French term adopted into English, use it correctly, not butchered half-anglicized and just wrong. Papier-mâché. Heck, if one is going to get the accent marks correct and flub the rest, why even use the term at all?

Ortega’s “Mass-Man” Leading the Way to. . .

Even just a glance at the passing scene leads one to observe that the Internet’s empowerment of Ortega’s “mass-man” and the attendant massive explosion of the growth and influence of “Dunning-Krugerands,” has only exacerbated the downward spiral toward Kornbluth’s “Marching Morons.”

The Marching Morons

Setting: Far future (less far, now, by a LOT, if today’s society is any indication). “The human population is now 3 million highbred elite and 5 billion morons, and the “average” IQ is 45 (whereas today an IQ score of 100 is average, by definition).” (? Wikipedia)

Well, American Spectator “Snuck” (#gagamaggot) in Another Moronic Headline

Ukrainian Leadership Claims Drone Sunk [sic] Two Russian Patrol Vessels

The headline is more telling than the actual article. If a Ukranian drone SANK a couple of Russian patrol vessels, good, but that R. Emmett Tyrell is willing to put his name on a mag that so grossly abuses the English language in a headline says pretty disgusting things about R. Emmett Tyrell’s lack of literacy, and poor literacy inevitably leads to sub-par communication of ideas (something I have had against American Spectator for some time, now, anyway).

Note: the PRETERITE (A.K.A., simple past tense) of “sink” is in no way, shape, fashion, or form “sunk.” “Sunk” is for perfect tenses (had/have sunk). Any headline writer that keeps his job after stupidly, illiterately, writing the headline proffered here does so only because editorial eyes are also pseudoliterate or just stupid.

OK, OK, maybe the problem is just that American Spectator is staffed with editors and headline writers who pattern themseves after lobotomized Bonobo Chimpanzees or Cooter from Gunsmoke.

American Spectator: promoting the destruction of literacy one headline at a time?

Reason #5,689

“Snuck” is an example of one of the MANY reasons I have such a deep distrust of democracy.

That is all. For now.

Classes of Writers

There are two main classes of writers that can — broadly — be discerned by this bright line divider:

1. Those who know how to use and appropriately do use m-dashes.
2. Pseudoliterate imposters (whose “work” is usually edited by lobotomized Bonobo Chimpanzees).

Oh, there are many other indicators, but that one will generally do the trick.

YW.

🙂


There may be those among my (2?) readers who question which class I belong in based on my own use of an m-dash above. If so, nanny-nanny-boo-boo to you. *heh*


BTW, I read the occassional pseudoliterate imposter for the dubious pleasure of making snarky comments in notes, then reposting those notes in a Amazon review. Yeh, it’s kinda mean, but they EARNED it. One such pseudoliterate imposter I read recently described a wedding (it was in an “action hero” sort of seventh grade boys’ fantasy). My impression of the “classy” (so asserted by pseudoliterate imposter) wedding was of a kinda trashy “trailer park” wedding. (And yes, I know some perfectly nice folks also live in trailer parks, but I’m invoking the “TPTrash” meme for shorthand, here.) It was a hoot trashing that, since it had already trashed itself.

More Contemporary Fiction Foibles

I tend to “file 13” books I pick up whose central character is openly described as “brilliant” and yet who consistently does execrably stupid things all within its realm of assigned “smartitudinousness” (is there a useful real world term for assumed but non-existent inteligence, or may I just use my snarky neologism?).

#gagamaggot