Category: Dumbasses

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The Proper Use of a “Splainsit Stick”

Any time I see “[Whatever]-splaining” used by someone to dismiss an argument, I know the person using the term is really saying, “I don’t have an argument, and I just don’t want to listen, so I’ll use this nonsense term instead of putting my fingers in my ears and chanting, ‘la-la-la-la. . .’ and maybe the horrible person using facts and reason will just go away and leave me with my chosen, ignorant opinions.”

At that point, I realize that the only proper response is raucous mocking.

And that, dear reader, is how one uses a “Splainsit Stick.”

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2018 Polls: The Stupid Vote Gains Ground

In future, vote all red, folks. (*sigh* Lesser evil and all that.) You will have all the years after you die to vote blue.

At least there’s one good thing out of the Repugnican’ts losing the House: hopefully it will gridlock Congress. I say hopefully, because

  1. When Congress isn’t passing laws, at least it’s not making things horribly worse and
  2. MAYBE it will gridlock. . . if the Repugnican’ts in Congress can overcome their predilection for bending over and begging, “Please. May I have another?”

It could happen. . .

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Clowns to the Right. . . Jokers to the Left. . .

But I REFUSE to be stuck in the middle of them.

There is almost no real news anymore. Almost all that purports to be so is Hivemind propaganda. It’s to the point that such sites as The Onion, Duffleblog, and The Babylon Bee are as reliable (or seemingly more so *sigh*) than “accredited” media sources.

And the so-called “right” end of the spectrum is little more reliable than the so-called “left” end of the media spectrum. While the opinion columnists at Townhall are generally more truthful than front page “news” at the New York Slimes, so-called “news” sites/organs such as Worldnet Daily, Breitbart, The Blaze,and ZeroHedge are all, to varying degrees, propaganda for the putative “right.”

Frankly, I don’t ascribe to Zero Hedge, for example, any more credibility than any other Hivemind “reporting.” Sure, like ABCNBCCBSMSNBCFOX, etc., it is propaganda, but every lie at least has a truthful counter. Zero Hedge can serve as a source of “idiot bait” research. In that, it can also be a “serious” source of info. . . of sorts (about as much as with any other Hivemind organ, give or take), if one really digs. 😉 Also, just like other aspects of the Hivemind (reflecting the biases of every point on Pournelle’s Political Axes), it can serve as a way of checking on what the Hivemind (at least its portion) is trying to obscure, twist, or otherwise outright lie about. Pulling the threads for amusement, if nothing else, can provide a few moments of entertainment, at least, and occasionally, as with other Hivemind elements, the facts it twists can be verified and lead to real and useful information when placed in their original context.

I laugh at the times I took Walter Cronkite seriously (as anything but an effective propagandist).

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It’s the Little Things #8,492

#sigh

*heh*

OK, now that that is out of my system. . .

Some of the absolutely stupid things some writers do baffle me, but at least I have found a way to be amused by them.

Recent “Dan Brown wannabe” book where the writer apparently felt even less desire to get anything right about any of his premises than Brown typically does went Brown even further by finding… unique ways to misuse plain English ( for example, misused “infallible” when groping for “unflappable”), have an “expert pilot” grab the “steering column”. . . on a helicopter whose propellers were making enough noise to keep the writer from thinking, “Maybe I ought to do my homework on helicopters before making a fool of myself in print.”

Hilarious.

Another? How about a fun-filled romp through a zombie apocalypse book filled with things like super-competent, manly-man hero filling up a late-model vehicle with gas and then “topping it off” after the pump clicks off. “Manly-men” know that can harm the vehicle’s evap system, cause the vehicle to run poorly, and even lead to hard starting or failure to start. In today’s world, it’s an easy fix (though sometimes complicated) to repair an evap system. . . IF one can narrow down the part or parts damaged by topping off, and costs can range from $10-$200, depending on several factors. In a zombie apocalypse scenario, having to repair the evap system on one’s go-to vehicle is sub-optimal.

But that’s OK, cos the book was chock full of this kind of stupid stuff, so reading it as a farce (OK, OK, skimming it, cos it wasn’t really worth reading *heh*) was. . . OK.

The problem with all these hilariously stupid books–not bad or “suckitudinous” books, just stupidly executed–is that the errors of logic, fact, grammar, punctuation, and usage they embody are just reinforced in whatever uncritical readers glom onto them. *sigh* There were once literate editorial staffs at tradpub houses to correct some of these problems, but even there, the quality of literacy in tradpub editorial staffs has waned.

Oh, well. At least I can laugh at and mock such things, and such amusement is worth something as the world generally goes to hell in a handbasket.

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At Least THIS Illiterate Practice Is Still Deprecated

The occurrence of “try and [verb]” as against the correct “try to [verb]” in print in general is still minimal. Unfortunately, the #gagamaggot misuse of “and” still seems to be very common in (typically) very poorly edited self-pub text and in social media, etc., all over the increasingly “mass man”-dominated1 Internet.

Social democracy sometimes sucks.

Do note that I have no objection to the use of “try and” when it is genuinely appropriate and adds meaning. For example,

“Two Judges Try and Fail to Shut Down Union Strike” in a headline is OK, though in a sentence in the body of a text it would be better-written as, “Two judges try–and fail–to shut down union strike,” or, slightly less clear, “Two judges try, and fail, to shut down union strike.”

Or,

“It’s better to try, and regret, than not to try, and regret.”

In neither of the cases above would “try to” convey the meaning intended, but cases like this are rare compared to misuses of “try and” where “try to” is appropriate. Sadly, the colloquial misuse of “try and” contributes to a poorer language rather than enhancing English.

1See Ortega.

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Down with Dysgraphia!

*sigh*

I have become convinced that, despite enabling many fine writers to become successful authors, self-publishing/”Indie publishing” has had an overall negative effect on the quality of text available. The sheer number of aspiring writers afflicting readers with their dysgraphia is appalling. *sigh* Oh, well, at least writing reviews on Amazon encouraging such dysgraphics to just PLEASE JUST STOP IT offer some slight ability to ameliorate the problem. Slight.

For MUCH less than the tip of the iceberg upon which contemporary lazy, subliterate, self-made dysgraphics sink their “great works,” start with:

Commonly misused words and phrases

Of course, a simple search for such things will turn up many, many more such lists, but that’s a start. And,of course, such lists don’t even scratch the surface of grammar that would gag a maggot, stupid misuses of tenses (quite apart from more ordinary grammar errors; for example, an understanding of past perfect and past conditional tenses seem to be dead, dead, dead *sigh*), and on and on and. . .

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Leaving a Legacy

“Die, my dear? Why, that’s the last thing I’ll do!” ~ Groucho Marx.

Well, even in this life, I don’t plan on dying being the last thing I “do.” I plan to rig the “urn” (a coffee can, of course) designated for my cremains to prank the person who opens it to dump my ashes in. THAT’S the last thing I’ll do. . . from beyond the “fiery trial.” Well, unless someone in my family spoils the surprise. . . I probably need to have some backup pranks set up, just in case. Maybe I can stretch my “presence” out a few years that way. 😉 Kinda leave an active legacy, ya know.

This olde pharte needs to get busy. . .

Continue reading “Leaving a Legacy”

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Matters of Principle or just Irrational Overconfidence?

I have ceased being shocked at the *cough* “deep thinkers” *cough* who share their “thoughts” in various print and eprint media whose “deep thoughts” are too deep to allow mundane things like spell checkers, and whose “literacy” extends only to what they have heard (and dependably misunderstood) others say.

It’s as though being stuck on a wad of gum at the far lefthand side of the Dunning-Kruger Curve is a matter of idiotic pride for them. Yeh, it’s a principle. #gagamaggot

Continue reading “Matters of Principle or just Irrational Overconfidence?”

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Asked and Answered. Move on.

I wear a scanable medalert bracelet with online med info that includes my allergies. Listed FIRST under “allergies” is my serious adverse reaction to being asked the same question more than once. When asked the same question a second (or third or. . . ) time, I tend to answer, “Asked and answered,” and let ’em look it up. I have no patience with lazy, arrogant, insulting asshats with nothing better to do than waste my time.

I answer cops the same way when asked the same question more than once: “Asked and answered. Move on.” (Last time I did so it was the local chief of police. He had illegitimately stopped me for a traffic infraction I had not committed. I don’t take their crap. I declined his offer of a ticket and moved him along. Seriously. Coincidentally, he resigned two weeks later. . . Yeh, seriously.)

I am too old to take crap from anyone. Period.

Forget “civil disobedience.” Such disrespectful behavior from people who think of themselves as authorities calls for less than civil disobedience. Outright disrespect returned for disrespect from people who are NOT one’s “betters.”

But maybe that’s just me. And maybe I should work on that. . . but I doubt I will.

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No, It’s “Warm Kitty, Soft Kitty”

My only problem with the shirt is that it’s based on the “Big Bang Theory” corruption of the copyrighted song by Edith Newlin, which is an adaptation of a Polish folk song, “Wlaz kotek na plotek.” Some not-so-smart writer, writing characters supposed to be smarter than he is (or some stupid lawyer thinking to avoid paying royalties?) screwed up the lyrics and mis-taught a generation of the less-than-literate.

And, of course, Newlin’s lyrics ordering the adjectives as first “warm” then “soft” follow the adjective order “rule” that any literate person simply knows from having read a lot of text written by literate writers:

Quantity, Value/opinion, Size, Temperature [warm], Age, Shape, Colour, Origin, Material [soft]

Hence, to any moderately well-read person (or person who is simply fluent in well-spoken English), Newlin’s “Warm kitty, soft kitty does not grate the way the “Big Bang Theory’s” corruption of her lyrics do. . . in a way that makes the characters who use the BBT’s corruption sound “Dumber than the average 5th grader.”

But apart from that I like the shirt. Oh, and Big Bang Theory’s not a bad show, apart from its laughable depiction of “smarter than the writers” characters. In fact, that alone sometimes makes it worth viewing for laughs.